Think positive

Turn on our televisions or computers, open a newspaper or magazine today, and we are inundated with reports of foreclosures, job losses, robberies, murders — so much pain, suffering and sadness.

When we are faced with a constant barrage of stories and images that are sad and discouraging, it is easy to feel we are drowning in a sea of negativity. This negativity can cause us to lose sight of the positive things in our own lives, which only deepens our sense of unhappiness.

It is important to stay positive, but we often do not know how to do so. Many people find trying to be positive a struggle.

Maintaining a positive attitude helps us reduce stress, and lessen worry, anxiety and fears. People who have a positive outlook are more pleasant to be around, are more open in their relationships and more willing to reach out to others.

There are many efforts we can make to be positive, and we need to recognize that being positive starts with a conscious choice.

We first need to choose to stop thinking negative self-defeating thoughts. Picture a big red stop sign and say to yourself, “Stop!” to the negative thoughts. We then shift our thinking to something pleasant. As we think about the pleasant thought or event, we can enhance the process by taking a moment to slow our breathing and use all our senses to shift our focus on the event.

For example, if we are rushing to get out of the house to an appointment, and it seems everything has gone wrong, choose to stop the negative thoughts, breathe slowly and shift our focus to think about what we can see at that moment that is beautiful or comforting; what we can hear that is soothing, such as birds chirping; what we can touch, such as the softness of our child’s hair; what we can smell, such as flowers in our yard or what we can taste, such as a soothing cup of tea. We can take the time to actually do these things or we can imagine them by using visual imagery.

We can choose to be positive by practicing gratitude on a daily basis. Think of all the things in our life that we have to be grateful for and acknowledge them.

Also remember to smile. Smiling has a wonderful effect — it’s contagious! When we share a smile or a compliment or do a good deed, we feel good and we have shared with someone else and they feel good too.

We can also choose to be positive by letting go of hurts, resentments, anger and self-criticisms, and replace those negative thoughts and emotions with thoughts that are self-supportive, self loving, such as “I can”, “I am a capable person”, “I am worthy.”

We can resist the downward spiral of negativity by reminding ourselves that we can choose to be positive by practicing these techniques.

Deborah B. Burnette, MA.Ed. is a licensed professional counselor at Centerpoint Counseling in Rocky Mount.